Finally, I Found You

The atmosphere was still quiet when I arrived at my school building. As usual, I went to freshen up in the bathroom. Girls, you know.
I looked at my face in the mirror and cleaned my skin with a facial cleanser. Then I combed my long, flowing hair with a tiny comb that always faithfully accompanied me wherever I went. And, hmmm, perfect now!

Outside, I heard Irawan's voice. The rich kid, son of a lawyer, was apparently standing in this area too. It seemed he was talking to someone on the other end of his phone. And I was sure it was Jane, the rich girl, daughter of a wealthy businessman.
This school, after all, is the city's favorite, where the children of the rich attend. Well, Irawan was one of them.

I stepped out of the bathroom.

“Morning, Cit!” Irawan greeted.

“Morning, Ir!”

My heart pounded then. Understandably, I had long harbored feelings for the guy in front of me. It was no secret that many girls had a crush on him. With his looks, demeanor, and reputation as the richest guy in school, it was no wonder.

Hmmm, but I didn't want to hope too much! I was well aware of who I was. I was just the child of a businessman whose venture was barely getting by. It was completely unbalanced compared to Deswita, Cindy, let alone Jane. Being able to pay tuition on time was already a stroke of luck for me. Perhaps that's why I felt somewhat excluded from the social circles at this school.

“Hey, why are you spacing out?!” Irawan's voice broke my reverie.

“No. I'll go first.” I replied.

Irawan looked at me sharply.

I walked away from him. “It's unusual for him to greet me,” I thought to myself.

*****

            In my tidy bedroom, the sun slowly began to leave me, still lost in thought about what had happened that morning. Vaguely, I saw Irawan's sharp gaze. Oh, what was wrong with that rich guy? Did he take the wrong medicine last night? Or did he have a strange dream? Ah, never mind, I couldn't answer it. Let it remain an unsolved mystery!

 The next morning, as usual, I went to school after saying goodbye to my parents. Once there, I freshened up in the bathroom as always. Then I hung out by the railing at the corner of the school corridor. Yes, my classroom was on the second floor. So I could refresh my eyes from this spot before diving into the complexities of school lessons. From here, I could observe students engaged in romantic relationships at the far end of the school. It was, after all, a strategic spot for dating. Sometimes, I often took pictures of them being affectionate with my phone camera. Yes, I liked collecting those pictures.

*****

The break bell rang. All the students rushed out to spend their break time. Some went to the canteen, some did homework for the next subject, and some met their significant others. At that moment, I saw Irawan and Jane walking together. Unlike usual, there was a hostile look between them. I wondered. Had they broken up? What had happened between them? Ah, but there was no point in knowing. It wasn't my business anyway. Briefly, I remembered what happened yesterday morning. Could this be related to the scene I had just witnessed? Yes, it could be!

In class, I saw Jane looking very restless. She answered almost none of Mr. Amri, the math teacher's, questions correctly. Yet usually, she was one of the smartest students in answering Mr. Amri's questions. I wanted to approach her and ask what was really going on between her and Irawan. But I thought it was useless. I knew how Jane viewed my status. Moreover, she considered me her rival in achieving academic success in class. So I decided to keep that question to myself.

**********

I couldn't sleep. It seemed the events at school made my mind probe, trying to find a conclusion I could draw. But I just let my thoughts wander wherever they pleased. Because I wouldn't find the answer.

Days passed. One morning, while hanging out in my usual spot, I saw an unusual sight in the corner of the school. Oh, yes, it was Jane! And who was with her? A guy I didn't know. Maybe he was from another class. Understandably, I didn't socialize much at this school, due to the gap between the rich and the poor here. And a conclusion popped into my mind. Jane already had a new boyfriend. Oh, how could she be so cruel as to dump Irawan, the rich guy from our school?

I took out the camera phone my father had given me for my Sweet Seventeen. Secretly, the urge to take some pictures of them arose. And I succeeded. I captured them in a kissing pose. I glanced at the photo. Hmmmm, one more collection to adorn my secret file on my PC.

 But how surprised I was when I turned around and realized who had been behind me all along.

“Irawan!” I said, panicking.

“Can I borrow your phone?”

I handed it to him. He turned on his Bluetooth, and that's when I realized what disaster was about to unfold. Oh, how foolish I had been to do all this. I slapped my own forehead.

 “Please, Ir, don't! I don't want to cause trouble with Jane. You know my family owes her a lot, right?”

 “Relax! I won't tell anyone who took this picture.”

“But, please, Ir!”

 Before I could finish my words, Irawan walked away towards his classroom next to mine. I wanted to chase him, but I knew it was useless. It was better to avoid that disaster. I opened the picture, then pressed a button on my phone. And the result was a confirmation that the image had been deleted. I felt relieved now.

*****

Break time arrived. I looked for Sela, my best friend. I told her everything that had happened from beginning to end, in as much detail as possible. Hearing all that, Sela just said,  
“Then you have to be careful, Cit! This problem could escalate to your parents. You know Jane's personality, right? I'll pray, really, that none of that happens.”

“Thanks, Sel!”

Outside, there was a scene that drew a lot of attention. We went out to see what was happening. Oh my! It turned out my fears had come true. Irawan, the lawyer's son, was publicly confronting Jane, witnessed by many people, because of her unethical behavior. He also showed the picture I had taken.

“Typical lawyer's kid!” Sela whispered. Her laughter broke out, though not loudly.

“Sel, the situation is this serious, and you can still laugh! What if he says who took Jane's picture? What if he knows I was the one who did it? What if what you said earlier really happens? What if………?”

I didn't get to finish my questions, which were just tumbling out, as Sela covered my mouth with her hand.

“Now, this is what you have to do, shut up!”

*****

In my bedroom, I looked at all the romantic pictures I had taken from the school floor corner. Oh, God, I promised I wouldn't do it again. I looked at those pictures for the last time. Then I deleted the secret file I had protected with a password.

“Bye,  my collection!”

Suddenly, a thought disturbed my peace as I was almost in dreamland. Yes, Sela's words earlier. What if this problem reached our parents? Because I knew Jane's character very well. She would definitely discuss it with her parents. And if that happened, oh, how angry they would be if they knew their daughter was humiliated. Especially if they found out who the culprit was. Citra, Mr. Suandi's daughter. Understandably, my father had once borrowed money from Jane's father. And until now, we haven't been able to pay it back.

“Ah, never mind! I hope that won't happen. I beg You, God!” I said to myself.

*****

            Morning dawned with the arrival of a new month this year. Yes, it was already March. I was in the second semester of my third year of high school. And that morning, I went to school with a heavy heart.

At school, I couldn't concentrate on any of the lessons because I was still thinking about it. Until finally, art class arrived. Hooray, this was my favorite subject! Besides being easy, I was also very interested in the teacher, who was funky and cool.

The other students were happy because they could be more relaxed during this class.

“Now we're going to create a concept map, kids! I'll give you one hour to complete it.”

Then she handed out our worksheets.

I saw Deswita take a seat in front of Jane and Cindy. The three popular girls were engrossed in conversation. I wasn't sure what they were talking about, but perhaps they were discussing the incident between Irawan and Jane.

 “Jane, why does your face look so troubled?”  Deswita asked.

“Well, how could I not be troubled! Just imagine if you were me. So embarrassed to be treated like that!” Jane replied.

Deswita: “Oh well, Jane, what else can you do? It's already done. Besides, you're already dating Reynald now, aren't you?”

“Yeah, I guess! But I'll never be able to forgive Irawan. Oh, by the way, I want to know who took that photo? Do you guys have any news?” Jane said.

“Maybe, but not for sure, it seems like that arrogant girl Citra, though.” Cindy said.

“Yeah, that's true.” Jane chimed in.

“Shhh, don't just accuse like that, or it'll become slander!” Deswita interjected.

 “Well, then who else? She always likes to hang out over there, you know!” Jane said.

 “I think there's no doubt. Especially since, as far as I know, she has a crush on Irawan.” Cindy instigated.

“Just you wait, I'll make her beg in front of me. Okay, we'll see.”  Jane sneered.

*****

One month had passed. Now the consequences of my actions were becoming more apparent. One time, I overheard my father telling my mother that Mr. Satrio (Jane's father) had withdrawn his loan to him. As a result, my father had to pay off his debts within two weeks. That was already a tolerance, he said.

 Hearing that, I was very startled. It turned out that what Sela had said, which had been my fear, was true. Moreover, one day my father and mother called me.

“Citra,” He said, stroking my hair.

“What is it, Dad?”

“Forgive your father and mother, dear.”

“What do you mean, Dad?”

“Your father can only afford to send you to high school. We have to pay off those debts as soon as possible. So your father doesn't have enough money to pay for your college.”

 I cried upon hearing that decision. But I decided to accept it. Perhaps this was punishment for my foolishness back then.

*****
           
            After completing the national final exams, I decided to look for a job. I got a job at a law firm, Hasiholan Napitupulu, as an Office Girl. Well, it wasn't a job that brought in a lot of money, but for now, this was the job I got. Well, you know the condition of our country, it's very difficult to find a job. Besides, at least I could cover my own needs so as not to burden my parents too much.

One day, while doing my tasks, I saw Irawan  enter this office.

“What's he doing here?” I thought to myself. Suddenly, I gasped. I just realized he was the son of the office owner.

“Hey, Cit, what are you doing here?” He asked, full of inquiry.

“Nothing. What about you, why are you here?”

“Well, obviously! This is Dad's office.”

 For a moment, I regretted it. Why did that question come out? I already knew the answer anyway.

“You work here?”

“Yes. Just trying to help my parents.”

“But you're a high school graduate. You should have a better job. Besides, aren't you going to college?”

“No.” I replied curtly.

“Why? Your brain is sharp enough to be a manager,  an engineer, or at the very least a secretary.”

“No funds,” I stammered.

 I couldn't hold back the flood of tears. All these misfortunes came one after another, unexpectedly. Suddenly, I remembered that incident.

“Oh, right, Ir. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure, go ahead.”

 “About that photo. Did you tell Jane that I took that picture?”

“Oh, about that. No, I didn't. Besides, that was a long time ago. It's old news, isn't it?”

“But because of that problem, the consequences became far-reaching, you know!”

“What do you mean?”

“No…No, never mind.”

“Never mind what? Come on, tell me!”

“No,  just forget it!”

 Irawan walked away, full of annoyance. I knew he was curious. But I didn't dare tell him everything about my situation. From the end of a hallway, I saw Irawan's sharp gaze fixed on me. Just like before, when that incident hadn't happened yet.

*****

           Days passed. It had been a month since I started working at Irawan's father's office. It was now June. The month of graduation that would determine the fate of many people. I was one of them.  A week before my graduation announcement, I met Irawan at his father's office.

“Can we talk for a moment, Cit?”

“Yes.” I replied curtly. I became tense. What was going to happen?

“Cit, forgive me. I already know everything from Sela. Forgive me for causing trouble for your family and for you now.”

 “It's okay. Perhaps it was just fate.”

“But fate can be changed, right?”

“Yes.”

“Here's the thing, Cit. I've already discussed this with Dad. He wants to help you. The case file has been prepared, and if they are proven guilty, they will be heavily prosecuted.”

“What….?!  But how…” I couldn't finish my question because Irawan cut me off.

“Just relax!  Everything will go smoothly. As for the costs, it's free, meaning you don't have to worry about it.”

“Thanks a lot, Ir!”

 “One more thing,” Irawan added.

“I hope you'll accept this. A scholarship for your college.”

“But, Ir, isn't that too much?”

“No,” He answered firmly.

 My heart was so happy. I wanted to rush home and tell my father and mother this good news. But it was still daytime. Not yet time to go home.

“There's one more thing, Cit,” Irawan added.

“What?” I asked flatly.

“I love you. Will you be my girlfriend?” Irawan's words this time truly made me gasp.

“But aren't you ashamed to date an Office Girl?”

“That's why you have to go to college. Who knows, you could become a manager or at least a secretary?”

“Okay, then!” I replied flatly.

I seemed to have forgotten the question. But his sharp gaze seemed to demand an answer from me.

“Cit, you haven't answered yet.”

Irawan's words sharpened his intent. And his gaze grew more intense.

“Yes,” I answered hastily.

“Okay, if that's the case, from today we're officially dating!”

*****

The graduation announcement arrived. I waited anxiously for the school's decision letter. And when a courier came with a letter, I immediately welcomed him. Swiftly, I took the letter from his hand and, without thinking, opened it right away.

“How is it, young lady, did you pass?”

“I passed, Sir. Thank you!”  The courier then left.

On the front porch of my house, I anxiously waited for Irawan, who had promised to pick me up for school.

“Ah, you finally came.”

“Come on, let's go now!” He urged quickly.

The Honda Jazz sped quickly to school. On the announcement board, the students' national exam results were displayed. And how satisfied I was to find my score among the highest, right after Irawan. I cheered. But Irawan became gloomy.

“What's wrong, Ir?”

“Nothing, nothing at all!”

The question just passed by.

*****

In my room, I read a letter that Irawan had slipped into my bag.

Bandung, 25-06-2006

Dear Citra.

With this letter, I want to inform you that I have to go to Singapore to continue my studies. My father made this decision. I hope you can accept it.

Oh, yes, your money and tuition fees, he will cover them until I return. I hope you can study diligently because after you graduate, you will be appointed as my personal assistant.

Yes, I won't be gone long. After I graduate, I will immediately become my Dad's subordinate. And you will be my personal assistant.

Thanks, Cit, for your blessing! And forgive me for telling you so suddenly. It's because I was only told last night. I'm leaving tomorrow. Pray for me, Citra! And I hope we can meet again soon.

Finally, I found you
The girl of my heart's desire
You are the changer of my life
And I hope we will always be united.