Free Heart

I used to think that freedom was simply being able to do whatever I wanted. To me, independence meant no one could limit my steps, choices, or desires. However, as I grew older, I began to understand that freedom doesn't always mean being able to do anything we wish. There's a much harder freedom to achieve: freedom from the shackles that grow within ourselves.

I realize I often get caught in prejudices that aren't necessarily true. I still easily judge someone based only on what appears on the surface. Sometimes, I form conclusions before truly understanding the reasons behind someone's actions. I forget that everyone has a story not always visible to the eye. There are hidden wounds, untold struggles, and reasons that may never reach me.

I also still often let past hurts influence how I view others. Experiences that once disappointed me sometimes make me more prone to suspicion. Someone's past mistakes can make me afraid to give opportunities to others who have never even made the same mistake. Without realizing it, I'm punishing someone for a wound they didn't cause.

At that point, I realized that perhaps it wasn't others who truly shackled me all this time. I myself was still carrying those chains everywhere. Those chains were named fear, prejudice, anger, disappointment, and an unwillingness to forgive. I want to be free, yet I continue to nurture something that keeps my heart from ever truly being at peace.

However, today I'm learning to pause. I'm learning that not everything needs to be met with immediate anger, and not all differences must end in hostility. Sometimes I need to be silent to understand. There are times I need to listen before speaking. I also need to be brave enough to admit that my perspective isn't always right.

I'm starting to learn to acknowledge my own shortcomings. Admitting mistakes doesn't mean defeat. Apologizing doesn't mean losing self-respect. Forgiving also doesn't mean condoning others' mistakes. For me, forgiveness is a way to free myself from a burden I've carried for too long. I don't want to continue living as a captive of something that has happened and cannot be changed.

I choose not to let hatred grow in my heart. Hatred might feel like strength when it first emerges, but ultimately, it drains oneself. The longer it's nurtured, the more space it takes from the heart. Space that should be filled with love, tranquility, and hope.

I also want to learn to understand before judging. Every human has a different journey. What's easy for me isn't necessarily easy for others. What looks simple from the outside might be a long struggle for someone. This awareness teaches me to be more careful in making judgments.

Perhaps change won't happen overnight. I might still become afraid, suspicious, disappointed, or misunderstand someone again. However, at least now I know that I have the choice to pause and look within myself. I don't always have to follow anger. I don't have to let past wounds dictate how I treat others today.

To me, that is one true form of freedom.

Freedom doesn't mean being free to do anything without thinking of others. Freedom is when I can control myself. Freedom is when I am no longer enslaved by hatred. Freedom is when I can make peace with the past without having to carry it into the present.

Free from fear.

Free from suspicion.

Free from prejudice.

Free from hatred that makes the heart lose its peace.

I may not be entirely free yet. But every time I choose to understand rather than judge, to forgive rather than hate, and to improve myself rather than blame others, I am taking a step towards that freedom.

Because, ultimately, the most valuable freedom is not just about a nation being liberated from colonialism, but also about the human heart being freed from everything that makes it lose its humanity.

Today, I want to be free in that way.

Free to be better than yesterday.

Free to make peace with myself.

Free to see other humans with more empathy.

Free to love without prejudice and live without being constantly dominated by wounds.

May one day, when I look within myself, I no longer find a heart busy searching for others' faults, but rather a heart that has learned to understand, accept, and forgive.

Because, perhaps that is where true freedom begins: when the heart is finally able to free itself.